Friday, May 15, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Day 3 Part II
Hello,
We seemed to have turned a big corner with Kate!! After our traumatic afternoon with the screaming and the spectacle at the lunch hour (mind you the other families thanked John for sticking up for them- Xiulan is difficult on everyone) I decided something had to be done to get Kate accepting me. So after our two hour nap I asked John to leave us alone. I knew Kate would be hungry after the nap. when she woke up she was screaming looking all over for John. I showead her a banana and she stopped crying immediately. She tried to eat the banana with the peel on it So we sat down peeled the banana and I fed the first half to her whlie she sat on my lap, the second while she sat on the bed. She actually started smiling. Next I changed her, which has been a struggle since Sunday. But I got her changed by myself it took two of us previously to hold her down. She's really strong!!!
Next we got down on the floor and played. She loves Patty cake and a few other items in the room that act as toys. We were really enjoying ech other so we then went down to the restaurant for dinner(John was hiding out in the lobby waiting for my signal). I was able to coax Kate, well more like force her into a high chairwith the help of two waitstaff. Kate just really likes to be held all the time. It's ironic because I remember working so hard with Jack to avoid this exact behaviour. So this need to be held make high chairs and strollers next to impossible without a total meltdown.
Finally Kate settled into the chair distracted by the food I had brought over from the buffet. She was eating up a storm. Mind you this feisty girl eats like a champ AND feeds herself. So even though I realize that food should not be a reward I was so elated that we were having such a nice time and Kate was not looking around in a panic for John that I brought over a piece of lemon cake layered with whipped cream. I cut the cake into small pieces and fed her a piece and she grunted for more. So I moved the plate in front of and she proceeded to put her whole face into the cake. The people next to us (the chinese stare at us constantly) laughed outloud and Kate relished the attention.
Down below in the lobby John was able to watch us and I signaled that I thought it was OK to come up and join us. When he came up Kate was elated and of course with some crying and outstretched arms indicated that she wanted up and out and in his arms. But John gave her a firm no, and a few of his noodles and she seemed to be OK. After dinner we really needed to get to Walmart for a few things which meant the stroller!! Ugh - after the days experience with the stroller we almost bagged the idea. But We forged ahead and forced he in kicking and screaming.
She yelled and cried for about 50 yards and then stopped. We made sure that only I interacted with her. John stayed behind the stroller at all times. She was great at wal-mart no crying just smiling. When we got back to the hotel I stayed in the lobby and john went to the room and picked up his computer and then headed to the busines center to catch up on work. Kate and I went up to the room to prepare for bed and she was delighful. I actually had her laughing while changing her diaper. After playing for a while and feeding Kate some milk I turned out all the lights. I lied down with her for less than 10 minutes and she was out and I moved her to the crib. Phew!!
I think we MAY have turned the corner and John can get some rest. Tomorrow John plans to get out of the room ahead of and Kate and I and we'll meet him for breakfast and see how she does.
It was a difficult day today, so John's earlier commentary was a justifiably tarnished. He really did have it tough and was my usual superhero to the rescue. So on a positive note the park we went to was actually very beautiful and in between all the crying from Kate and bossing from Xiulan I tried to enjoy the Thai and Tibet temples, the gorgeous gardens, mountainous backdrop, and the serene lake. It was a beautiful place and my new friend Celine (one of the adopting parents)and I road on a zip line across a huge lake to get to the Tibetan Temple. We laughed a lot. We sort of can't believe we have FINALLY come to China and what a crazy experience this truly is!
We seemed to have turned a big corner with Kate!! After our traumatic afternoon with the screaming and the spectacle at the lunch hour (mind you the other families thanked John for sticking up for them- Xiulan is difficult on everyone) I decided something had to be done to get Kate accepting me. So after our two hour nap I asked John to leave us alone. I knew Kate would be hungry after the nap. when she woke up she was screaming looking all over for John. I showead her a banana and she stopped crying immediately. She tried to eat the banana with the peel on it So we sat down peeled the banana and I fed the first half to her whlie she sat on my lap, the second while she sat on the bed. She actually started smiling. Next I changed her, which has been a struggle since Sunday. But I got her changed by myself it took two of us previously to hold her down. She's really strong!!!
Next we got down on the floor and played. She loves Patty cake and a few other items in the room that act as toys. We were really enjoying ech other so we then went down to the restaurant for dinner(John was hiding out in the lobby waiting for my signal). I was able to coax Kate, well more like force her into a high chairwith the help of two waitstaff. Kate just really likes to be held all the time. It's ironic because I remember working so hard with Jack to avoid this exact behaviour. So this need to be held make high chairs and strollers next to impossible without a total meltdown.
Finally Kate settled into the chair distracted by the food I had brought over from the buffet. She was eating up a storm. Mind you this feisty girl eats like a champ AND feeds herself. So even though I realize that food should not be a reward I was so elated that we were having such a nice time and Kate was not looking around in a panic for John that I brought over a piece of lemon cake layered with whipped cream. I cut the cake into small pieces and fed her a piece and she grunted for more. So I moved the plate in front of and she proceeded to put her whole face into the cake. The people next to us (the chinese stare at us constantly) laughed outloud and Kate relished the attention.
Down below in the lobby John was able to watch us and I signaled that I thought it was OK to come up and join us. When he came up Kate was elated and of course with some crying and outstretched arms indicated that she wanted up and out and in his arms. But John gave her a firm no, and a few of his noodles and she seemed to be OK. After dinner we really needed to get to Walmart for a few things which meant the stroller!! Ugh - after the days experience with the stroller we almost bagged the idea. But We forged ahead and forced he in kicking and screaming.
She yelled and cried for about 50 yards and then stopped. We made sure that only I interacted with her. John stayed behind the stroller at all times. She was great at wal-mart no crying just smiling. When we got back to the hotel I stayed in the lobby and john went to the room and picked up his computer and then headed to the busines center to catch up on work. Kate and I went up to the room to prepare for bed and she was delighful. I actually had her laughing while changing her diaper. After playing for a while and feeding Kate some milk I turned out all the lights. I lied down with her for less than 10 minutes and she was out and I moved her to the crib. Phew!!
I think we MAY have turned the corner and John can get some rest. Tomorrow John plans to get out of the room ahead of and Kate and I and we'll meet him for breakfast and see how she does.
It was a difficult day today, so John's earlier commentary was a justifiably tarnished. He really did have it tough and was my usual superhero to the rescue. So on a positive note the park we went to was actually very beautiful and in between all the crying from Kate and bossing from Xiulan I tried to enjoy the Thai and Tibet temples, the gorgeous gardens, mountainous backdrop, and the serene lake. It was a beautiful place and my new friend Celine (one of the adopting parents)and I road on a zip line across a huge lake to get to the Tibetan Temple. We laughed a lot. We sort of can't believe we have FINALLY come to China and what a crazy experience this truly is!
Day 3 with Kate
Greetings from Kunming again!
Kate is resting comfortably in her crib, so I’ve got a few minutes to type this post for you to read Tuesday morning.
We just got back from a tourist trip to an “Ethnic Village” with the other two couples and our escort Xiulan, or as I like to call her Edna from The Incredibles movie. More on that in a minute.
This Ethnic village features all the different ethnic groups from the country, each with their own pavilion. (Imagine that… A place to see the other ethnic groups. Just think if we had this in the States? “And on your left is the Irish pavilion… don’t get too close or they’ll get you drunk. Now, say Hola to the Hispanic pavilion!” The comedic value would be just too much.)
Anyway, the place was kind of like Disney World where you can see the entire country in one place, though without Mickey and Minnie for the kids. Instead there was a bunch of old people who stare at you when you walk by, say something that is invariably derogatory to you in Chinese, and want to come and hold your child. I’ll take Mickey and Minnie any day.
All humor aside, it was pretty cool and we got some good pictures of the different groups. Oh, and Jen rode on a zip line. Now that’s something you don’t see every day!
Note: if you’ve made it this far in the blog, I will buy you a beer when I get back.
Now back to the reason why we’re on this trip: Kate!
We’re really having a tough go on our third day with her. She still doesn’t like to be held by anyone but me/John, and isn’t very fond of the stroller, so I/John get to carry her around all day. Xiulan/Edna can’t believe that I’m carrying her around all the time, and says that all the men in the hotel are calling me a Chinese housewife. I suppose I’ve been called worse.
This is also causing great frustration with Xiulan/Edna who thought she could take Kate in the stroller away from us, and try to “break” her from her hysterical crying. Fifteen minutes later we could still hear her screams from about 50 yards away and it was too much for Jen so she went and got her. Of course when she arrived, the requisite group of old people had surrounded Xiulan/Edna and were taking turns holding Kate. So I got to carry Kate for the rest of the day. My arms are going to be HUGE after this trip!
Needless to say we’re getting a bit tired of Xiulan/Edna telling us what to do with Kate and how to treat her. She’s
very old-school with children, and reminds me of the Edna character in the movie The Incredibles. You should really rent the movie. Sixty nine years old, short in stature, huge glasses, and super tough as nails. (Heck, she rode her bike to the hotel today with a load of laundry on it! Imagine your own grandmother doing that?) She literally tells the group what to do at all times, and today at lunch I had enough of her, so when she told us to put Kate in the stroller to feed her I said no pretty sternly. I think she got the picture that we’ll do what we want with Kate.
(Now if I recall correctly, we went through this crying experience with Cito, as have most parents, and it was just as trying on our collective patience and our abilities back then as it is today. How soon we forget.)
All right, I’m sure everyone who’s made it this far in the blog is asleep or is invariably saying something derogatory to me/John in English and just wants it to end.
Until tomorrow!
Thanks for reading
Kate is resting comfortably in her crib, so I’ve got a few minutes to type this post for you to read Tuesday morning.
We just got back from a tourist trip to an “Ethnic Village” with the other two couples and our escort Xiulan, or as I like to call her Edna from The Incredibles movie. More on that in a minute.
This Ethnic village features all the different ethnic groups from the country, each with their own pavilion. (Imagine that… A place to see the other ethnic groups. Just think if we had this in the States? “And on your left is the Irish pavilion… don’t get too close or they’ll get you drunk. Now, say Hola to the Hispanic pavilion!” The comedic value would be just too much.)
Anyway, the place was kind of like Disney World where you can see the entire country in one place, though without Mickey and Minnie for the kids. Instead there was a bunch of old people who stare at you when you walk by, say something that is invariably derogatory to you in Chinese, and want to come and hold your child. I’ll take Mickey and Minnie any day.
All humor aside, it was pretty cool and we got some good pictures of the different groups. Oh, and Jen rode on a zip line. Now that’s something you don’t see every day!
Note: if you’ve made it this far in the blog, I will buy you a beer when I get back.
Now back to the reason why we’re on this trip: Kate!
We’re really having a tough go on our third day with her. She still doesn’t like to be held by anyone but me/John, and isn’t very fond of the stroller, so I/John get to carry her around all day. Xiulan/Edna can’t believe that I’m carrying her around all the time, and says that all the men in the hotel are calling me a Chinese housewife. I suppose I’ve been called worse.
This is also causing great frustration with Xiulan/Edna who thought she could take Kate in the stroller away from us, and try to “break” her from her hysterical crying. Fifteen minutes later we could still hear her screams from about 50 yards away and it was too much for Jen so she went and got her. Of course when she arrived, the requisite group of old people had surrounded Xiulan/Edna and were taking turns holding Kate. So I got to carry Kate for the rest of the day. My arms are going to be HUGE after this trip!
Needless to say we’re getting a bit tired of Xiulan/Edna telling us what to do with Kate and how to treat her. She’s
very old-school with children, and reminds me of the Edna character in the movie The Incredibles. You should really rent the movie. Sixty nine years old, short in stature, huge glasses, and super tough as nails. (Heck, she rode her bike to the hotel today with a load of laundry on it! Imagine your own grandmother doing that?) She literally tells the group what to do at all times, and today at lunch I had enough of her, so when she told us to put Kate in the stroller to feed her I said no pretty sternly. I think she got the picture that we’ll do what we want with Kate.
(Now if I recall correctly, we went through this crying experience with Cito, as have most parents, and it was just as trying on our collective patience and our abilities back then as it is today. How soon we forget.)
All right, I’m sure everyone who’s made it this far in the blog is asleep or is invariably saying something derogatory to me/John in English and just wants it to end.
Until tomorrow!
Thanks for reading
Sunday, May 10, 2009
We have her!
Greetings again from Kunming,
Where to begin... oh yeah, we have Kate!
We all met in the lobby of the hotel yesterday, and were driven to what we think was an administration office in a very interesting part of town about 10 minutes from the hotel. I don't know where to begin, other than it was a surreal experience.
We were driven through some alley ways, complete with storefronts offering hanging chickens ready to cook, and pulled into an apartment complex straight from the 1950s. None of us were sure what to expect next, so we just followed the orders of our handlers who told us to climb the stairs to the second floor and go into an office. Up we went and turned the corner into the room and there were 3 babies all in a row on a couch each with someone from the orphanage holding them.
All three families were silent and didn't know what to do next. The three babies were sitting on the couch oblivious to what was happening, and our handler Xiulan (shoe-lan) said Reed, and pointed to Kate.
The person from the orphanage stood up and handed Kate to Jen while I was snapping pictures left and right.
Again, the only way to describe it is surreal.
Jen was holding Kate for some time while Xiulan was looking her over for any illness, rashes or bruises. Kate does have a minor rash on her right cheek, and no one's sure what it is until we get her to a doctor.
Then I got a chance to hold her and I've forgotten what it's like to hold a 10 month old baby compared to carrying Cito. She's light as air, and she was very comfortable with me holding her. The one interesting thing we noticed is that she must have been around men in her foster home, because she didn't like Jen holding her and only wanted me to hold her. She would go into quite a fit when Jen would try and pick her up, but when I held her she was quiet.
Anyway, I think we were at this office for 30 minutes before it was time to go back to the hotel, where we had some lunch, and Kate took a nap (and so did we for 3 hours). I was holding her the whole time through lunch and when it was time for a nap she didn't like being put down and went berserk, so she fell asleep on my chest.
We met the group again for dinner where Xiulan brought us to a restaurant where we had some fantastic food that's nothing like the restaurants back home. I think my cholesterol shot up a few points.
After dinner we went for a walk a few blocks down from the hotel to a big square where we watched about 30 people in a huge circle who were dancing to some music. It was like a community dance where any one could join in and follow along. Believe me I was tempted but Jen held me back.
Then a really weird thing happened. While Jen and I were watching the dancing, some people started coming up to us talking to Kate and I assume were saying how cute she was (we couldn't understand what they were saying, but a lot of the women were cooing over her), and then they started grabbing at her to take her out of the stroller. All of a sudden there were at least 20 people surrounding us all wanting to talk to us and look at her. I should have charged admission, but I started to get a little nervous about the spectacle we were causing and Kate was going a bit bonkers, so we moved on. Maybe the had never seen a western couple with a baby before?
Kate slept through the night, again after falling asleep on my chest, and this morning we met the other two groups for a ride back to the administration office where we signed some more papers to make the adoption official. Kate was crawling all over the place and I think she'll be walking in no time.
We then drove to what I think was passport office where she had her picture taken and started the paperwork to allow her to leave the country.
We're back at the hotel now, and Kate's asleep in the room. We don't have web access in our room, so I'm in the business center typing this and I forgot my camera to upload the pictures. I'll do that in the next post.
Some observations:
- Driving here is total (and I mean TOTAL) chaos. Electric donkeys and bicycles rule the road and cars are secondary.
- Bike helmets aren't a thought here when riding a bike, and the bikes are used for utility. Nothing fancy, just transportation from one point to the next.
- No kiddie car seats. Kate was in my arms for any of the trips we've done in the car.
- It's very warm, so we've dressed Kate in some light clothes and let her roam around in bare feet. Everyone we've seen says she must be cold and needs shoes, while she's sweating profusely. Go figure.
- The people here are very nice, though they stare at us quite a bit.
That's all for now. I'll have the pictures posted later today.
Thanks for reading.
Where to begin... oh yeah, we have Kate!
We all met in the lobby of the hotel yesterday, and were driven to what we think was an administration office in a very interesting part of town about 10 minutes from the hotel. I don't know where to begin, other than it was a surreal experience.
We were driven through some alley ways, complete with storefronts offering hanging chickens ready to cook, and pulled into an apartment complex straight from the 1950s. None of us were sure what to expect next, so we just followed the orders of our handlers who told us to climb the stairs to the second floor and go into an office. Up we went and turned the corner into the room and there were 3 babies all in a row on a couch each with someone from the orphanage holding them.
All three families were silent and didn't know what to do next. The three babies were sitting on the couch oblivious to what was happening, and our handler Xiulan (shoe-lan) said Reed, and pointed to Kate.
The person from the orphanage stood up and handed Kate to Jen while I was snapping pictures left and right.
Again, the only way to describe it is surreal.
Jen was holding Kate for some time while Xiulan was looking her over for any illness, rashes or bruises. Kate does have a minor rash on her right cheek, and no one's sure what it is until we get her to a doctor.
Then I got a chance to hold her and I've forgotten what it's like to hold a 10 month old baby compared to carrying Cito. She's light as air, and she was very comfortable with me holding her. The one interesting thing we noticed is that she must have been around men in her foster home, because she didn't like Jen holding her and only wanted me to hold her. She would go into quite a fit when Jen would try and pick her up, but when I held her she was quiet.
Anyway, I think we were at this office for 30 minutes before it was time to go back to the hotel, where we had some lunch, and Kate took a nap (and so did we for 3 hours). I was holding her the whole time through lunch and when it was time for a nap she didn't like being put down and went berserk, so she fell asleep on my chest.
We met the group again for dinner where Xiulan brought us to a restaurant where we had some fantastic food that's nothing like the restaurants back home. I think my cholesterol shot up a few points.
After dinner we went for a walk a few blocks down from the hotel to a big square where we watched about 30 people in a huge circle who were dancing to some music. It was like a community dance where any one could join in and follow along. Believe me I was tempted but Jen held me back.
Then a really weird thing happened. While Jen and I were watching the dancing, some people started coming up to us talking to Kate and I assume were saying how cute she was (we couldn't understand what they were saying, but a lot of the women were cooing over her), and then they started grabbing at her to take her out of the stroller. All of a sudden there were at least 20 people surrounding us all wanting to talk to us and look at her. I should have charged admission, but I started to get a little nervous about the spectacle we were causing and Kate was going a bit bonkers, so we moved on. Maybe the had never seen a western couple with a baby before?
Kate slept through the night, again after falling asleep on my chest, and this morning we met the other two groups for a ride back to the administration office where we signed some more papers to make the adoption official. Kate was crawling all over the place and I think she'll be walking in no time.
We then drove to what I think was passport office where she had her picture taken and started the paperwork to allow her to leave the country.
We're back at the hotel now, and Kate's asleep in the room. We don't have web access in our room, so I'm in the business center typing this and I forgot my camera to upload the pictures. I'll do that in the next post.
Some observations:
- Driving here is total (and I mean TOTAL) chaos. Electric donkeys and bicycles rule the road and cars are secondary.
- Bike helmets aren't a thought here when riding a bike, and the bikes are used for utility. Nothing fancy, just transportation from one point to the next.
- No kiddie car seats. Kate was in my arms for any of the trips we've done in the car.
- It's very warm, so we've dressed Kate in some light clothes and let her roam around in bare feet. Everyone we've seen says she must be cold and needs shoes, while she's sweating profusely. Go figure.
- The people here are very nice, though they stare at us quite a bit.
That's all for now. I'll have the pictures posted later today.
Thanks for reading.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Greetings from Kunming
We are in Kunming now. Our flight through Beijing was seamless.The international terminal in Beijing was impressive. An architectural marvel. Extremely clean and efficient. All the airpprts are very quiet and there is traditional chinese instrumental music playing in the background. As soon as we went outside though the air quality was noticeably unhealthy. People commented about that to me before travelling and it really is noticeably different than in the states.I imagine over the next week we will experience a lot of interesting cultural differences. In fact this already started. We have noticed that it is typical for Chinese people to cut in front of you in line. This happened to us twice in the airport. Then while on board the flight from Beijing to Kunming I walked to the back of the plane to use the restroom. I was at the end of the line when 2 different people put their hand on my shoulder and turned me to the side and stepped in front of me I finally decided I could wait until we landed.
When we arrived in Kunming and debaorded the plane the air was noticeably fresher here and it was a joy to walk into bagggae claim and hear our names being shouted across the hall by our local escort and coordinator Xiulan(pronounced shoe-lon). We retrieved our bags and were escorted to our hotel. It was easy. The city is large with 1.8 million residents and quite westernized.It was a livevly Saturday night in the city with lots of young people on electric scooters. All of whom were helmetless. Xiulan referred to them as electronic donkeys. Very dangerous but very convenient.
The hotel is actually four star and is far nicer than we anticipated. The room is decorated very traditionally with asian flair. Very expensive furnishings linens and draperies. But the beds leave nuch to be desired, very hard. We think its box spring only. Nevertheless we slept. Of course we are still up very early.
As I guessed we will meet Kate later this morning instead of tomorrow. We are nervous. Especially me. Xiulan who is very nice but very straight forward and very much business said "tomorrow we examine the baby, you know we must see the baby first before finalizing.You never know with these adoptions". These were not exactly reassuring words for me to hear, especially when sleep deprived.
The whole thing is a little nerve- wracking. Xiulan explained that she will examine the baby herself to make sure there is nothing funny. Whatever this means? Despite her very frank and a tad bit gruff nature (she was described by people to us as a bulldozer and the desription is fitting) you definitley know that Xiulan is in your corner. And you do NOT want to mess with her. So the plan is to meet Xiulan in the lobby at 9:30 this morning to go and pick up Kate.
There are two other American families adopting and staying in the hotel as well, we will meet them this morning and travel all together to the adoption office in Kunming to meet the babies.
So more to follow!
When we arrived in Kunming and debaorded the plane the air was noticeably fresher here and it was a joy to walk into bagggae claim and hear our names being shouted across the hall by our local escort and coordinator Xiulan(pronounced shoe-lon). We retrieved our bags and were escorted to our hotel. It was easy. The city is large with 1.8 million residents and quite westernized.It was a livevly Saturday night in the city with lots of young people on electric scooters. All of whom were helmetless. Xiulan referred to them as electronic donkeys. Very dangerous but very convenient.
The hotel is actually four star and is far nicer than we anticipated. The room is decorated very traditionally with asian flair. Very expensive furnishings linens and draperies. But the beds leave nuch to be desired, very hard. We think its box spring only. Nevertheless we slept. Of course we are still up very early.
As I guessed we will meet Kate later this morning instead of tomorrow. We are nervous. Especially me. Xiulan who is very nice but very straight forward and very much business said "tomorrow we examine the baby, you know we must see the baby first before finalizing.You never know with these adoptions". These were not exactly reassuring words for me to hear, especially when sleep deprived.
The whole thing is a little nerve- wracking. Xiulan explained that she will examine the baby herself to make sure there is nothing funny. Whatever this means? Despite her very frank and a tad bit gruff nature (she was described by people to us as a bulldozer and the desription is fitting) you definitley know that Xiulan is in your corner. And you do NOT want to mess with her. So the plan is to meet Xiulan in the lobby at 9:30 this morning to go and pick up Kate.
There are two other American families adopting and staying in the hotel as well, we will meet them this morning and travel all together to the adoption office in Kunming to meet the babies.
So more to follow!
Hello from Beijing
We're here in Beijing after a uneventful 14 hour flight. We watched 3 movies, and I watched some of Long Way Round on my Ipod.
I think we got 45 minutes of sleep, and are now waiting to get on the next flight to Kunming at 6:55 pm local time. It's a 3.5 hour flight and in theory someone will be there to take us to the hotel.
Apologies for the brevity, but we're exhausted, and I'm typing this on my blackberry so I'm not feeling that wordy today.
I'll post another tomorrow after we get settled and will try to post some pictures as well.
As always, thanks for reading.
JR
I think we got 45 minutes of sleep, and are now waiting to get on the next flight to Kunming at 6:55 pm local time. It's a 3.5 hour flight and in theory someone will be there to take us to the hotel.
Apologies for the brevity, but we're exhausted, and I'm typing this on my blackberry so I'm not feeling that wordy today.
I'll post another tomorrow after we get settled and will try to post some pictures as well.
As always, thanks for reading.
JR
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